Saturday, May 31, 2014

#5 What I Believe - Learning About Life

What I Believe - Learning About Life



I haven’t wanted to think everything that I’ve thought lately. I’ve begged for freedom—for a respite from invading hints, and both subtle and blatant reminders of events scattered throughout the past year of my life. I’ve only wanted to move forward into my future without dragging along pains from my past. 

Can anyone actually do that? 


One year ago today I entered a hospital emergency room at 5:30 am. Almost exactly twelve hours later, in a larger hospital, an anesthesiologist pushed a needle into my IV line. An icy burn surged from my wrist to my elbow before my eyes willingly closed and I entered surgery. During the induced sleep a neurosurgeon sliced my neck open and my life became altered forever. Less than 36 hours after slipping my feet into flip-flops at a predawn hour and I left home, I fumbled with the same flip-flops for my return trip. I don’t remember that ride. In fact, many things I experienced during that time and the following few weeks are lost from my memory. 

Gone.

But there are also memories I hope I’ll never forget.
 

If I’m not wearing shades of pink I usually have to specifically look at my scar in order to see it. Sometimes I pause to examine it, and this becomes a powerful moment when I remember significant insights I’ve gained because of my experience—of what life is really about. While facing the mirror something else amazing happens—I rarely recall my personal losses because the positive memories that flood over me infuse me with power that sustains me when:

***When physical or emotional pains seep through me,

***When my sudden and uninvited inabilities expose my losses, 

***When adjusting to my new life feels too hard and unwanted and I only want to rebel, 

***When my dreams seem to be swirling down the drain like an ongoing parade of sadness. 

This is when I grasp with both fists what I gained, and I hold onto the good memories tucked inside my heart and bet my future on them. 

I hold onto the good, and I smile

Life is good. It is valuable. It is for living. My new life is packed with barriers and boundaries of the unexpected kind. What I’ve lost is costly, and I won’t pretend it’s not, but it is also insignificant when I compare it to what I’ve gained. Somewhere during those long hours and days of fog laced by pain and sleep and recovery, I was entrusted with precious gifts of knowledge and understanding. 

I love my life—right down to my thin little pink scar. And honestly, at times over the past three or four weeks, remembering what I encountered this past year and what bumps and deep dark pits might lay ahead felt scary and threatened to overwhelm me more than once. But on the whole, and I mean the WHOLE whole, remembering the rough spots of last year has strengthened all of my memories of the good and brought them forward again. 

Who knew that would happen? Certainly not me! Today I’m more than happy and willing to pick up last year and happily carry it into the future with me and appreciate every minute of it. 






 

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

#4 What I Believe - Creativity



#4 What I Believe—Creativity
 ***
Picture a triangle with me sitting at one point, my husband at another, and an orthopedic surgeon perched on his swivel stool on the third. My doctor is saying to me, “No more kneeling down for the rest of your life.” I glance at my husband. His eyebrows lift, but he remains silent. 

As we left the examining room I whispered to my husband, “There’s something the doctor doesn’t know.”

My husband grimaced, knowing full well what I was speaking about. I say, “I’m only halfway through refinishing our wood floors. I’ve got another 800 square feet to go—all on my knees.”

My sweet husband shot me a look of panic. Maybe he pictured our house slumping into neglect and decay, or worse, him helping me. 

Nothing like that happened. You see, I believe in creativity.

Below you'll see my floor the day we visited the doctor. The kitchen, dining room, and other areas looked perfect and beautiful, but there were still miles and miles of boards waiting to be refinished. 


After creativity jumped on board I found a solution: I recalled an old office chair from retirement and figured a way to use it to keep me off my knees.


My son caught me having fun while staining the floor. I’d “kick off” and sail across the room—laughing. Of course, hearing me laugh and wheels rolling like waves of thunder over his head brought him running with his camera.


Taking a break. I was smiling because pretending I was on an amusement park ride helped. With 700 square feet left to go I needed lots of energy and enthusiasm, and smiles always help.


Later I was caught relaxing my neck. I was barely recovering from spinal surgery and had been advised to start moving my neck. The floor gave me that opportunity, but it also required tons of breaks. Few creative ideas mean 100% ease...


Here's a finished shot of the room once the floors were finished, including several layers of sealer and plenty of time to cure. I can't ever fully describe the feelings of accomplishment and joy I experienced when I witnessed the final outcome of lots of research, time and hard work with hampered abilities. 


I Believe in Creativity

Almost since birth I’ve been afflicted with an overactive Creativity Gene and a woefully underdeveloped Ability Gene. I’ve spent my entire life attempting to narrow the gap between the two so they form a permanent and pleasant bond. 

I believe creativity is a vital, happy-making element in life that produces discontent when neglected, and remarkable joy when developed. 

In my life I’ve noticed these six elements create a good mix for creativity:

Thoughts: Creativity often starts in my mind with new ideas or never before considered thoughts. Sometimes there are little visual pictures or "videos," or sparks of inspiration that light up my thoughts like bright little sparklers. Other times there are bursts of understanding about how something can be made better, or ideas on how to make something work out. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of how to solve a problem in a new way. Thought creativity is a lively, focused burst of mental creativity! Despite being incredible, thought creativity doesn’t go much further without help.

Words: On almost an even plane with thoughts, words are powerful! Many times someone has said something and I’ve suddenly understood how to tackle a problem I’ve been mulling over. A creative idea sometimes comes because of a single word or a phrase, whether from others or through the words I speak. Sometimes the words are written. It’s funny, but sometimes just a few words strung together in a certain way might spark a creative thought concerning an entirely different topic. Spoken and written words are powerful. They create in more ways than we can ever imagine. I’ve used words—my own voice at times—when I’ve needed extra help to start or carry through to completion a project I’m working on. 

Hands: Being a visual person, I’m constantly influenced by what I see, whether it is in nature, in someone's actions, or through something someone made with their hands. Hands, spurred on by thoughts and words, perform creatively. I've toured magnificent palaces in Europe and trekked through ancient ruins to hike to the top of Mexican pyramids. I've gazed around in wonder, wishing I knew the thinking behind the structures and how the minds and hands involved created the finished products. Hands do so much! They gesture love and disapproval. They create in positive and hurtful ways. When they finish their creation, they don't always leave behind evidence of their work, other than in the heart and mind. Can I just say that I believe it's important to use care with what and how we create with our hands? 

Gifts: Don’t picture a box wrapped in shiny paper with a pretty bow, but think about other, less tangible gifts. I believe each of us arrived in life packed with all kinds of gifts in various amounts. I’m talking about internal gifts, such as curiosity, persistence, commitment, devotion, enthusiasm, etc. Because we each come with different levels of internal gifts, it’s interesting to see what we individually create with these inborn sparks of genius or talent embedded within us. We can enhance these personal gifts over time and through work and practice, or we can let our individual gifts sit idle, turn dormant, or waste completely away.

Resources: Earlier today I flipped on my computer and ordered materials to hopefully make summer a little more pleasant. I used financial and other resources. Our resources include tangible, concrete assets, as well as personal characteristics and learned skills. We all know we each have differing kinds and amounts of resourcesnothing is equal or even. I picked up my first needle and thread when around age four. I looked at both the eye and the tip and considered both ends challenges to be mastered as I discovered their differences. If you think you have no resources look around. Open doors, cabinets, boxes and your mind. You’ll discover tons of resources! This morning I used my computer, money, my summertime plans and my knowledge of scouting for discount coupons to avoid paying full price. Another example of resources: When I had lots of little kids and life was often filled with commotion and noise I used some great resources each evening: I dimmed the lights (a resource) and played quiet, gentle music (another resource), and spoke quietly (a third resource) to create a peaceful bedtime mood that helped settle little ones down and preserve my sanity.   

Heart: My heart takes over and dictates the direction and how far I take each of my creations of thought, word, hands, gifts and resources. How fast, how far, how well done, how long I’ll stick with trying to resolve a tough problem and how much time I'll devote to developing a skill all depends on my heartthe powerful feeling and emotional part of my being. Of all the varied kinds of creativity to whip up, I believe the best are those that leave our lives and others lives a little better than before; those that express love, caring and create meaning and purpose in the mind and heart. 


I believe God is the center of all creativity. He is the Great Creator.  

Creation never ends. Life was never meant to be lived stagnant, but should always be changing in meaningful ways.

Happy creating! 

** If you're feeling uncreative today (you might recognize it as a defeated, unproductive feeling), then take a few minutes to grab a paper, make three columns on it, and write three lists: First: Successful creations from your past. Second: Creations you're currently working on. Third: Things you plan to create in the near future. Write down at least three or four things in each column, and make sure each list includes at least one intangible creations. 
  


Always remember creation takes time, anywhere from a few minutes to many days, weeks, months or years. Creation also requires effort. Sometimes only a smidgeon, but at other times it requires a huge amount of commitment.

(The above photo shows just a portion of the changes I created in one room of my former home.)

**Confession: I did the 3 lists activity and discovered it was harder to remember past creations than current and future ones. How silly is that!?! 

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